This was definitely a trying month - a serious roller coaster of emotions. It has been a little harder than I expected - but not in terms of taking care of the little ones - I have found myself feeling guilty about everything. As a result - have realized a few things:
1. Having a baby this time of year (at least after having 1 child already) is NOT a good idea. When I had Luci, it was easier to get through the summer. Now, it kills me when Luci asks me to go outside, go swimming, go on the swings, etc - because the reality is that I don't want to take Alena out in this heat. Therefore, I think that it is smarter to have a baby in the fall or winter - that way the little one is older by the time summer comes along, which would make outings MUCH easier!
2. When we try for #3 - we will wait until Alena is at least 2 years old before we even start trying to get pregnant. That way, Luci will be in school and Alena will (hopefully) be out of the "terrible two's" phase, which would make things much easier.
Now onto the kids:
Alena gave me the best night yet just last night - she nursed at 10:30pm and then didn't wake up until 5am! It was the best gift ever! I just hope that she doesn't go back to ever 3 hours again tonight.
I have started pumping a little just to get Alena used to taking a bottle, which she has done without any problems - thank goodness! I have a friend whose baby refused a bottle and therefore went a week without eating while my friend was at work.
Although I have been feeling guilty about not being able to do the things with Luci that I typically would be able to do - she is really good. She'll play quietly by herself with her toys or read books to herself when I can't play with her. She'll even bring puzzles or books over to me when I am nursing Alena, which I love. Plus - she is so sweet with her little sister.
We had a crazy weekend - I decided to venture out on Saturday and take the girls to Gabi's soccer game and then to the pool for a little. Saturday's weather was not bad at all and Alena really enjoyed being outside for a while. Sunday was a different story - we had a graduation party to go to - and I was a little too over-confident after how well Saturday went. Sunday's weather was crazy hot and and crazy humid - and the baby was NOT happy. Not to mention that John has been unfortunately MIA for the past month due to getting the pool ready to open after teaching all day, and since this weekend was opening weekend, he couldn't come with me to anything. Thank God for my parents - they are my saviors! They saw how overwhelmed I was yesterday with feeling split between the 2 girls, and offered to take Luci to a picnic today. Although I was supposed to go to the picnic too, today is hotter and more humid than yesterday and I didn't think that the baby could handle the weather again.
Here's hoping that next month will be a more emotionally stable month for me!